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I don't know, I just don'tknow...."I look at her, thinking of all my past life, my family that I'll neversee again, my mother, my wife, my children. How can anyone deal withknowing that all that is gone? And now, the only mother I reallystill have isn't even sure I'm her daughter. What do I do? How do Icope with this, too?"Mom?" I try again.She looks up with some tears in her eyes and I feel so terrible. It'slike I've stolen this body, I've stolen this life. Yet, I had nothingto do with it. Some quirk of nature. Some act by something outsideall that we know or think we know. Where is my old life? It's totallygone and buried. I have nowhere else to go. Should I tell her?Would she believe me? Should I lie and say, it's all right,everything is just fine, I've just had a lot of time to think aboutthings and I realized they had to be different? She knows the truth.At least a part of it. I know she knows. And I think she realizesnow, that I see that. And there is that. She didn't have a boyfriend at the moment; it wasn't that she didn't like boys just that she didn't feel a need for one just now.They parked the jeep near some woods and Beth helped Marie carry the picnic as they followed a path deep amongst the trees. Marie took Beth's hand and led her deep into the woods, leaving the path they headed through the trees. Suddenly Beth saw a glint of sunlight on water and moments later they stood by a deep secluded pool, a waterfall fell into it and a stream cascaded amongst the trees."It's beautiful," said Beth"I used to come here as a child, I don't think many people realise it's here."Putting the basket down Marie spread a blanket on the ground and started to unpack the picnic, as Beth sat down beside her Marie passed her a glass of wine."To happiness," toasted Marie"Happiness."They sat in silence sipping the wine and nibbling at the food Marie had brought, Beth suddenly found herself feeling nervous. She looked at Marie and saw her own feelings.
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